Feeling guilty because I’m on vacation

I really need to get some work done. Didn’t do it yesterday because…I don’t know. I think I was just waiting for the new laptop, which is awesome, I might add. The only problem I might have, if I were to say anything, is probably the somewhat sharp edges off the keyboard, where I rest my wrists while typing. They tend to dig into my wrists while I’m typing. I think the only way to keep the edges from digging into my wrists is either raise my wrists so they don’t rest on the laptop, which doesn’t make typing very comfortable, but another way could be to wear long sleeves and have that act as a barrier between the laptop edge and my wrists. Either that or start wearing sportbands, LOOOOL.
Speaking of sports, tomorrow, Steph and Nate have invited us to play volleyball on a sand court, so that’ll be fun. I really do miss playing sports, so I’m really looking forward to that. In the mean while, I think, in about half an hour or so, we’re supposed to be going to hang out at Anna’s and grill out. I don’t really want to go, to be honest. I don’t fancy being in someone else’s house for an extended period of time when I can’t relax, and I do have a lot of work I want to do, since I know that tomorrow will probably be a wash.
Am I wrong for trying to get some work done while I’m here in Chicago? Is feeling guilty because I can’t get anything done my fault? Should I just put my laptop away and just relax until we get back to China and then go into overdrive? I don’t know. I don’t like the feeling of being idle, but then again I am on vacation, right? So, feeling guilty for not working while I’m on vacation…well, is it kind of destructive? I don’t know how I feel about this. I want to write, every day, but some times that’s just not possible. Either that, or I’m just not trying hard enough. I suspect it might be more the latter than the former. I think I’m going to stay home tonight. I’ll turn something on TV and just write or whatever. I did my JP study in the morning and I did some writing so right now, I think the only thing I really have to do is edit and write. If I stay at home and just write, I think it’s very possible for me to write 3-5k and maybe even get a chapter or two edited.
To be honest, in regards to editing, I am terrified of opening it and getting down to work. It’s almost embarrassing how bad I feel when I read through Megan’s comments. It’s almost like I don’t want to look at my failure. Still, I really want to release The Handsome Devil #2, so at some point I need to just grit my teeth and rip the proverbial bandage off the gaping wound that is THD #2.
Well, I just sent the text to Anna, telling her that I’m not feeling up to hanging out, which is true. I’d rather work than hang out with people and besides, I’ve already made a date to go see a movie with Anna this coming week.
Still, I wish I didn’t lie about feeling under the weather, literally, haa. (God, I hope she doesn’t find this blog)
My writing goals for today: 3k
Editing goals: Editing checklist and 1 chapter
I would love to edit a chapter a day and then be able to release THD #2 sometime in the middle of September, but we’ll just have to see.