A lot of random thoughts that make no sense

Managed to get down a little less than 600 hundred words written last night before I went to sleep, so that’s a small victory for me. Unfortunately, I’ve been awake for about two hours now and it is now fifteen minutes before five am, fuck my life. I mean, it’s probably not so bad. I can take a nap in the afternoon, just a couple more hours to make up for the fact that I probably got three hours of sleep.
David talked in his sleep. “TOLD YA” and it was said so clearly, I was almost sure he was awake. Didn’t think so as he fell silent and didn’t say anything else, and was heard snoring a couple minutes later.
But for those two hours I was awake, I did think a lot about my future and what I need to do to prepare for the next 1.5 years before we leave. Or technically, I guess we really only have 1.2 or 1.3 years before we have to leave…hopefully. That is, I hope we leave. Who knows, maybe we’ll be stuck here for another year if Dave can’t find something suitable. Either way, I have to prepare for the worst/best scenario, which is us leaving by summer 2018.
I was reading a book called The Erotica Handbook while I was trying to sleep and thought it was quite interesting…definitely worth a shot, although it’s like I’ve said before: if one wants to make money off erotica, then you have to look at it from a long-term point of view. There’s no way nowadays for someone to just publish a couple of erotica stories and expect to make any money off it. The book I was reading mentioned something about writing an erotica short story at 7.5k, with 2.5k written every day, so that means a 1st draft every three days. Keeping to a 7 day regular 8 hour a day work week, it is possible to start from the 1st draft and hitting publish on Amazon KDP every week. So start writing on Monday, finish the 1st draft by Wednesday, edit on Thursday and Friday, proof/cover design on Saturday and publish by Sunday.
That’s a grueling schedule and I’m not sure if I can do this part-time. If I were to get into this, I would have to make this a full-time thing for a few months and see how that pans out. Conceivably, if I do this for three months, I could come out with 12 short stories and seeing the sales at that point, should be able to give me some kind of idea as to whether it would be a good idea to keep on this.  Three months in the scheme of things isn’t that long of a time but when I’ve got until the end of this year to come up with some kind of viable income…
It’s a gamble. Luckily, I type fairly quickly and at 1k every 20 minutes, I can write 2.5k in an hour. That’s not too much time to devote to writing erotica if I want to continue writing erotica and what I want to write. Because at this point, it’s no longer about writing what I want anymore, because I feel like I don’t have enough time anymore to just write what I want. God, I feel like an idiot. We’ve been here since 2013 and I’ve got nothing to show for it. Fuck. I’m so sick of hating myself. I need to change. I realize this. I must change.
I’m going to change.
The problem is, I’ve been saying that for awhile now. Words are cheap, action…not so much.
I wrote down my schedule for today in the last entry, but now, considering that I’ve gotten 3 hours of sleep, I’m not sure how well I can adhere to it. If I could, I’d go back to sleep, but I agreed to meet Beka at the gym at six and I don’t want to not go…as far as the gym is concerned, I’ve blown her off way too often.
On the other hand…if I don’t feel tired…and now that I think about it, I did sleep for 3-something hours from noon to around 3-ish in the afternoon, so maybe those hours, plus the three hours a few hours ago will be enough to keep me going until tonight. I’d believe this if I didn’t have a class to teach tonight, but I might need a few hours to recharge if I’ve going to entertain kids for an hour.
So today, as far as my schedule goes, I’d like to follow this:
6:00-7:30 gym
7:30-8:00 breakfast
8:00-8:30 edits
8:30-9:00 answer emails
9:00-11:30 writing, half hour spurts with a 5 minute break in between each session
11:30-12:30 lunch
12:30-1:30 walk
1:30-2:15 reading (maybe I can take a nap at this point?)
2:15-3:00 edits
3:00-4:15 writing
And then the rest of the day goes to hell because Dave comes home. It would be great if I can do some art from this time to going to bed since I haven’t wrapped my fingers around the tablet stylus in a few days. I think once I finish the rest of the commissions, I might want to do some fan art, just some art for myself. I’d love to do couple art of Sophie/Howl and Naruto/Hina, maybe even ship Nami/Sanji.
Okay, that’s enough talking from me. I’ve got a few minutes before I’ve got to get ready to go to hit the gym, so I’ll probably read or something, I dunno.
Right, here I go to get ready for the gym. I’ll check in after I come back and have some breakfast (probably will be some toast and a cherry tomato salad, or something easy, dunno…and FUCK IT’S RAINING OUTSIDE, ARGH.)
Okay…back. It’s almost one thirty…or it will be by the time I type this. Finally called about the hospital visit, that’s set up for this Friday, so that’s this Friday completely shot for the most part. I’ll be able to get some work done on the train maybe but if I leave at 7, I probably won’t be able to come back home until 5 or so. Yeah, rush hour traffic both ways, ick. But at least I’m getting it done. It’s been four years since my last gyno check and it’s bad that I’ve waited this long. Still, better late than never…probably wouldn’t apply in this case, ha.
So, I haven’t had lunch yet, but I’ve defrosted the pork steak and I’ll probably eat something with veggies, pork and mushrooms. I should probably marinate the pork before anything else and let it sit in the fridge for a little while…or not.
I’ve decided that instead of closing this entry as soon as I’m finished with it, I’m going to keep it open and keep checking into it from time to time, hopefully when I can check off certain items off my checklist. I know for a fact I won’t be able to hit my lunch time walk, but I’m going to do that after work tonight, so either way, still doing it.
I’m going to head off to my edits now and then I’ll answer some emails that really, really need to be answered.
Okay, the time now is almost four and I’ve just had my…lunch? dinner? I don’t even know. I think it was my dinner. When I come back from my classes/walking, I’ll probably just have some cherry tomatoes for a snack or something else like that. Spent some time and made a pretty awesome stirfry with two different kinds of mushrooms, marinated pork, cabbage, onion and broccoli in a sweet and spicy soy sauce with sesame oil. I’m going to leave in about 1.5 to teach. Dave is probably going to get home in half an hour and then speed off to the gym. I suppose it would be a good idea if I packed his bag for him and made his shake so he can leave as soon as he gets home. I’ll send him a note and see what he says.
Got my clothes through Taobao today and I’m so happy because they all fit! I’ve got two all weather jackets with removable thermal lining, so I am SET for Korea. I’m going to try to stick to a 50 dollar daily budget. So Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday…I really need to call Ctrip and see if I can get my trip cut back a day so I can come back with a friend. I might have to pay a little extra for the change cost, but I think it would even out when you consider how much I’ll have to pay for a taxi by myself in addition to not being able to teach on Wednesday.
Well, called Ctrip and for some reason, they can’t change my flight. Sigh. Guess I’m coming back on Wednesday night by myself. Oh well. Maybe I’ll get a lot of writing done then.
Okay, Dave’s home, so I’m going to answer my emails now. Although, I kind of get the feeling that if I spend the next hour answering emails, there’s no way I’m going to get anything written. On the other hand, I do have all day tomorrow…hrm hrm…
Okay, going to answer the emails.
Finally finished replying to the emails waiting for me, and I can finally move them from the inbox! Now, I have to get ready for work. I’m going to take this laptop with me and go to work a little soon and attempt to get some work done before the kids start showing up.
Here goes!
Okay, went to work, came back, had a small cherry tomato salad and now I am very close to falling asleep. I made plans to go to the gym tomorrow morning at 6 again. It IS hard, but what I need to do is wake up at 5, then going to the gym forty-five minutes later wouldn’t be such a difficult task.  If I want to wake up at five, then I should be asleep by ten, right? Yep, If I’m asleep by ten, that means I can get 7 hours of sleep. Well, it’s already 9 now and I haven’t made my breakfast shake, prepared Dave’s coffee, or cleaned the litterboxes. I’ll have to do that at 9:30. Until then, I’ll try to write.